For her, survival means starting anew
安布尔·史密斯
Many people see two outcomes for someone in cancer treatment, says Sophie 弗里德曼. Either the person dies, or the person gets better, and their life returns to normal.
Especially for those who face cancer treatment as young adults the way she did, there is no normal to go back to, 她指出.
弗里德曼, 32, of Fayetteville is a librarian and archivist by training, with a master’s degree in library and information science. She returned to Central New York during the pandemic and embarked on a new career as a project manager with a tech company.
Her cancer began as a quarter-sized blue mark on her arm, 就像瘀伤一样, 只不过它不是平的. It did not hurt, but she could move the mass beneath the skin. A primary care doctor told her not to worry — which she tried to abide by — and to return in six months if the mark was still there. A month later she decided to have it reevaluated. Something about it felt off.
An ultrasound image of the mass revealed it to be a complex cyst, meaning it was comprised of tissue and blood. The doctor offered two options. She could have a magnetic resonance imaging scan and a biopsy to find out what the mass was made of. Or she could have it surgically removed.
弗里德曼 opted for surgery, which was done in February 2022. Lab testing showed the mass was Ewing sarcoma, which usually is found in children and adolescents. A diagnosis in someone in their 30s was rare. “弗里德曼’s surgeon referred her to 推荐最近最火的赌博软件 orthopedic oncology surgeon Timothy Damron，医学博士, an expert in cancers that occur in the limbs.
After six rounds of chemotherapy, she underwent a second surgery to remove more tissue. Then she had an additional eight rounds of chemo, sometimes requiring hospitalization. Her chemo was a regimen including five medications. She began connecting with other young adult cancer survivors on social media and decided to share her experiences on Instagram and TikTok.
“At first I didn’t share a lot, 但我分享的越多, 我就越觉得自己有力量, and the more I felt like I was advocating for myself and other people,她解释道. “Not only was I connecting with other people in similar circumstances, but I was also educating the people in my life who knew nothing about this.”
She never photographed the blue mark, which people on social media constantly ask to see. She has a fairly extensive scar there now. She considers herself lucky. Ewing sarcoma usually occurs in the bone and requires amputation or bone replacement surgery. Her tumor was confined to soft tissue. It was so close to the surface that Damron did not have to remove muscle or do a skin graft.
Her active treatment is over. She’s technically a survivor. 但这是一个艰难的角色. She wrestles with fear of recurrence, 害怕继发性癌症, 幸存者的内疚, side effects now and longer-term side effects, physical and mental exhaustion, 抑郁症, 焦虑和更多.
“这是可怕的. I won’t lie,” 弗里德曼 says. 在某些方面, this post-treatment era is harder in a psychological and emotional sense than going through treatment.”
Weeks after 弗里德曼’s treatment ended, 她的猫, 波西, was diagnosed with small cell lymphoma affecting her gastrointestinal tract. The cat is on a special diet now. She also has a vitamin injection every week and a chemo pill every other day. 弗里德曼 frets about giving 波西 drugs so similar to the ones she had to take.
Survivorship feels impossible for her, some days. 有时她很焦虑. 有时她很沮丧. She does have days where she feels normal, where she doesn’t think about cancer. 弗里德曼 is grateful her treatment worked, that she’s in remission. She would like people to understand that for young adult cancer survivors, there’s no going back to a previous life before cancer.
“Our lives are changed forever. We are new people,” she says.
This article appears in the summer 2023 issue of 癌症 Care 杂志.
